If you are experiencing abuse at home, it is important you take measures to ensure you stay safe, especially when ending the relationship. Although the Court can offer protection against an abuser, it can sometimes take some time before a final Order is made. You should consider what steps can be taken to ensure you remain safe in the interim. Making a safety plan in advance can help to protect yourself, and your child/ren.
One of the biggest considerations to be made is in respect of the technology that you use on a daily basis. It is important to ensure that you change your passwords, such as the passwords on your:-
- Email account- This prevents the abuser accessing potentially sensitive communications, such as correspondence between yourself and a Domestic Abuse Support Worker or solicitor.
- Social Media account- It is important to log out of your Social Media accounts from all of your devices, and change your password. This prevents the abuser from accessing your account and potentially finding out where you are and what you are doing.
- Bank account- Not only does this prevent the abuser from accessing any money you have, it also prevents them from finding out where you have been, and finding out your new schedule.
There is technology that can help to keep you safe, such as HollieGuard. Creating an account with HollieGuard is free and easy, and you can input details such as your characteristics, i.e. hair and eye colour, and also your vehicle details. You can also create an emergency contact, setting up notifications to send an alert to your emergency contact if anything concerning happens to you. The app has a number of safety features, including:-
- The Alert Feature
- If you feel threatened, you can either shake your phone or press the alert button in the app, which sends out an alert. This sends your current location to your emergency contact. Your phone will automatically begin recording audio and video.
- The Journey Feature
- Setting your journey within the app ensures your emergency contact is kept informed of your journey.
- The Meeting Feature
- When meeting with someone, or going to a new location, you can set a timer for the meeting. This means that if you lose signal or internet connection, an alert can be sent if you do not mark yourself as “safe” within the set timeframe.
- The Man Down Feature
- This feature sends an alert if the app detects a sudden fall or if you have stopped moving for a period of time.
- The Report Feature
- This allows you to quickly and easily record an incident, which is automatically time stamped and geo-tagged.
HollieGuard also offer additional safety features if you pay for a subscription. You can read more about HollieGuard here.
Also, did you know you can make a silent 999 call? If you are in danger, but cannot speak on the phone, dial 999 and press 55 when prompted. This will then transfer your call to the police.
There are a number of organisations who can offer help and support if you are suffering, or have suffered, abuse. One of the most well-known organisations is Women’s Aid, who are a national charity offering a range of support and services to those who are, or have, experienced domestic abuse. On their website, Women’s Aid provide access to a variety of helpful resources, including guides on helping to identify whether you are in an abusive relationship, what should be considered when leaving an abusive relationship, and how to move on after leaving an abusive relationship. Women’s Aid also have a helpful directory to help you find local support services. You can find this here: Women's Aid Directory *
There are a number of other services who can assist victims of domestic abuse, including:
- Reducing the Risk *
- Reducing the Risk offer assistance from Independent Domestic Violence Advisors, who can also assist during Court processes.
- Reducing the Risk are based in Oxfordshire, Buckinghamshire, West Berkshire, Torbay and Slough
- Karma Nirvana *
- Karma Nirvana offer help and support for Honour Based Abuse, and work nationally.
- National Domestic Abuse Helpline / Refuge: *-
- The National Domestic Abuse Helpline offer a free, 24/7 telephone helpline to assist you any time you may need. Their number is 0808 2000 247.
- Refuge also offer housing and financial support, along with supporting you when applying for Government benefits
- ManKind: *
- ManKind is an organisation specialising in providing support services to male victims of domestic abuse
- Support for Pet Owners:
Both Dogs Trust and Cats Protection offer support services for people who are fleeing domestic abuse and have pets whose safety they are concerned about. Both services are free and confidential, and offer placements for your pets until they can be safely reunited with you.
All websites marked with * contain a quick exit function to close the webpage.
The National Domestic Abuse Helpline also offer their services with the assistance of Language Line, to provide access to interpreters for non-English speaking callers. This service is free of charge, and ensures language is not a barrier when seeking help and support. Their number is 0808 2000 247
There are a number of Court Orders which could help to protect you, and keep you and your child/ren safe. The most common Orders are Non-Molestation Orders, Occupation Orders and/or an Order for a Transfer of Tenancy.
A Non-Molestation Order is an injunction, and this can protect you and your child/ren from being harmed, harassed and/or threatened by an abuser. These can be made on an emergency basis, and an application can be made “without notice” to the abuser. This means that you can apply to the Court for an Order, without notifying the abuser before the Order is made. This can be particularly helpful if you are trying to leave an abusive relationship, and are still currently living with the abuser. You can read more about Non-Molestation Orders and how we can help you to apply for one here.
An Occupation Order is an Order which can determine who can remain living in a particular property, or defining what areas of a property a person can enter. This application can be made on the same form used to apply for a Non-Molestation Order. An Occupation Order Occupation Orders are generally only made for a duration of up to 6 months, and so they are not a permanent solution. However, they can be helpful if you are concerned that the perpetrator will return to the home in the interim. You can read more about Occupation Orders and how we can help you to apply for one here.
A more permanent solution for ensuring that an abuser cannot return to your home if they are listed on the tenancy, is to apply to remove them from the tenancy. Often, this can be done via agreement by speaking with your landlord or housing association. If the abuser agrees to be removed, then the landlord/housing association can transfer the tenancy into your sole name. This means that the abuser does not have the right to return to the property. However, if the abuser refuses to agree to the transfer or, if there are rental arrears, you will need an Order from the Court to grant a Transfer of Tenancy. This is something that we can assist with.
You can also find tailored advice, depending on what help you need, here: The Survivor's Handbook - Women’s Aid
You can also contact the 24-hour National Domestic Abuse Helpline on 0808 2000 247, or visit their website here: Homepage - National Domestic Abuse Helpline
If you are a victim of abuse and would like to speak to someone in relation to obtaining a Court Order, then please contact our family team at info@brethertons.co.uk or phone 01295 270999 (Banbury Office), 01869 252161 (Bicester Office), or 01788 579579 (Rugby Office).
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