This month is World Suicide Prevention Month, a month in which to remember the lives lost to suicide and to raise awareness about suicide.
Part of September’s campaign is World Suicide Prevention Day, which is on 10 September, though, I must admit, I did let that particular day pass me by this year, perhaps subconsciously on purpose.
Sadly, I have experienced the loss of a loved one who died by suicide. It was in 2021, so not all that long ago, and it has been an eye-opening couple of years since.
The stigma associated with suicide is remarkable, and one that I battled when dealing with my own grief. I felt almost embarrassed to confide in people (even those I know well) about what had happened. That got me thinking, because I also felt strongly that I should not feel like this in addition to the grief I was already battling with.
After the initial devastation of our loss had begun to ease, I felt compelled to do some research in to how I could potentially help this cause. This led me to numerous charities who offer amazing support, but in particular, led me to asking my employer, Brethertons LLP, if they would support me to become a Mental Health First Aider with MHFA England in 2022, which of course, they did.
The process of becoming a MHFAider was emotionally and mentally challenging, but I wanted to rise to the challenge so that I could ensure that I was able to give something back to society by using my own experience for good.
MHFA England want to prevent suicide through education and intervention. It is time to break down the stigma and support each other. This is how you can support someone:
Warning signs – have you noticed changes in the personality and behaviour of someone you know?
Listen – this is key. You do not need to have the answers, just the time to lend an ear. How often do we take the time to really listen and show someone that you really do care?
Check in – most suicides occur within 3 months of the onset of a period of improvement. This seems completely illogical on the face of it, but is something I have seen a few times in my years as a probate practitioner, so I know that it is a vivid reality for someone experiencing suicidal thoughts.
Ask - do not be afraid to ask someone if they have suicidal feelings. I once worried that this question might make a person more likely to have suicidal thoughts, or even plant an idea. It took me a little while to be at peace with the fact that this is not true, and in fact, this is the most important question you can ask someone experiencing suicidal thoughts.
Finally, we must not forget to look after ourselves. We all know we should do it, but never before recently have I realised how important it is. Take that break, talk to a friend, seek support from one of the many charities out there so willing to help. I know it sounds simple, even cheesy, but self-care is such a simple step in the right direction.
Be kind, look after yourself, and those around you.
If someone is at immediate risk of suicide, call 999 immediately.
If someone you know if having thoughts of suicide, encourage them to call Samaritans on 116 123 or text ‘SHOUT’ to 85258.